The first recording today starts with the end of Richard & Judy talking to Dr Raj Persaud.
Then there’s another episode of The Simpsons – Burns, Baby Burns.
They go to an Apple pressing plant, and afterwards there’s one of my favourite exchanges between Marge and Lisa. “Next to spring and winter, fall is my absolute favorite season. Just look at all this beautiful foilage.” “It’s not “foilage” mom it’s foliage.” “”Foliage” That’s what I said. “Foilage.” It doesn’t take a nucular scientist to pronounce foilage.”
Rodney Dangerfield guest stars as Larry, Monty Burns’ long lost son.
He doesn’t really fit in Mr Burns’ world.
Yale Admissions don’t think much of Larry’s test scores. Burns offers a donation. “Well frankly, test scores like Larry’s would call for a very generous contribution. For example a score of 400 would require a donation of new football uniforms, 300 a new dormitory and in Larry’s case we would need an international airport.” “Yale could use an international airport Mr Burns.” “Are you mad, I’m not made of airports. Get out.”
Larry invites Homer to dinner, and Burns blows up at him, telling him he’s an ignoramus and a disappointment.
Homer tells Larry that the only way to win back his father’s love is a phoney kidnapping.
It almost works. Almost but not quite. “No I can’t do it it’s just not me. I’m sorry Larry I can’t be the family that you need.” “Oh that’s okay, I got a wife and kids. That reminds me they’re probably wondering where I went. I told them I’m going for coffee. That was a week ago.”
Media Centre Description: Mr Burns’s long-lost son stages his own kidnapping. Featuring the guest voice of Rodney Dangerfield.
Recorded from Channel 4 on Thursday 14th February 2008 17:58
After this, the recording ends with the start of Hollyoaks.
The next recording is the episode of Torchwood that I missed yesterday – Adam.
There’s a new face in the Hub, Adam, but everyone acts as if he’s been there for years. Gwen comes back from a break, and wonders who the hell he is. He touches her on the shoulder and she gets visions of a past that didn’t happen, and suddenly she knows who he is.
Adam also appears to have a relationship with Tosh.
And Owen is suddenly all nerdy, which is obviously signalled by wearing glasses.
Jack is walking through the cells, and he sees a little boy there, but he’s seeing things.
Gwen goes home, and freaks out when Rhys is there, because she’s completely forgotten him. Interestingly, this recording is cut from the version that’s on iPlayer during this scene. Gwen first grabs a knife to protect herself from Rhys, then her gun. In this recording the part with the knife is gone, presumably because this went out at 7pm.
She calls Jack and Adam, and when they arrive, Jack is confused, because he knows exactly who Rhys is.
Jack goes hunting a weevil, and has another vision, of a man who says “Get out, son.”
He leaves the tunnel and Adam’s there, asking what he saw, and gets Jack to remember things. It’s his childhood on the Boeshane Peninsula.
Something we never see attacks, and Jack runs with his little brother Gray, who was the boy Jack saw earlier. As an aside, it looks like everyone there shops at the Gap. They run from the threat, but Gray lets go of his hand, and when young Jack looks back, he’s nowhere to be found.
Tosh and Owen are working late, Owen is looking at a box that’s been found, although the computer has no record of it. Then Owen tells Tosh that he’s in love with her. It’s awkward, And Tosh’s response is “That is completely inappropriate.” This made me laugh, given how many times Owen has said much, much worse things , and nobody’s ever batted an eyelid. Maybe Adam has hypnotised them all into thinking that Torchwood suddenly has a code of conduct, and HR procedures.
Gwen is back with Rhys, still not remembering him, but having been assured by everyone that they are indeed engaged. From her point of view it must seem like a huge gaslighting. But when Rhys kicks off at a shop assistant walking off when he was about to pay for stuff, it obviously rings a bell with Gwen.
Ianto is checking his diary, looking to see if he noted down the recovery of the box that Owen was looking at. What he finds disturbs him. His diary doesn’t have any reference to Adam.
Adam is suddenly there. “Why would I leave you out when you’ve been here so long? Like I’m remembering a man who doesn’t exist. What are you?” “Cross me, and I will fill you full of fake memories until your head is on fire, because that’s how I exist.” A threat he makes good on, by showing Ianto fake memories of him murdering girls. This is a really disturbing sequence, and this has also been cut for this showing.
Another scene that’s been trimmed is Tosh and Adam’s rumpy pumpy. “How far would you go for me?” he asks. “Would you die for me?”
After more flashbacks to his tragic backstory, Jack returns to the Hub to find Ianto, who begs to be locked away. “I murdered them, in cold blood. You have to lock me away… ..before I turn on you. None of you are safe.”
He tries a lie detector on him, but it says he’s telling the truth. Jack doesn’t believe it. “No. This is not you. Something’s changed you. You’re not a murderer. I’m certain of it.”
Jack finds the CCTV of all the time Adam has done the Derren Brown shoulder squeeze.
Everyone else arrives, and it’s a bit tense from Ianto and Jack. Then Jack pull a gun. “Jack, you know me. You recruited me three years ago.” “When I think of my team I see you there. But I don’t feel anything for you. No pride, no warmth…”
Tosh pulls a gun on Jack.
Adam tries to argue he’s just altruistic. “I didn’t mean any harm.” “You’ve changed us.” “For the better! You didn’t remember who you were. I helped you. Look at Owen, all his cynicism gone. He’s a different man now. Selfless, happier. And Toshiko, too – she’s never been this confident.”
Jack gives all the team 48 hour amnesia pills and asks them to take them.
Adam offers to find Jack’s last happy memory with his father.
But he corrupts that too, putting himself there, and turning the memory against Jack.
Next day, the team can’t work out why they’ve lost two days of their memories, and all the records of the last two days are missing from the system. Jack looks at the box, which Adam told him contained his last good memory with his father. He gets it open, and all that’s in it is sand.
Media Centre Description: Science-fiction drama created by Russell T Davies. An alien with the power to change memories infiltrates the team. With Captain Jack caught up in memories of his lost family, and Gwen struggling to remember Rhys, it takes Jack’s love of Ianto to reveal the truth. But there’s always a price to pay.
Recorded from BBC TWO on Thursday 14th February 2008 18:58
BBC Genome: BBC TWO Thursday 14th February 2008 19:00
The next recording is missing the start of the programme, the next episode of Ashes to Ashes.
It’s the Royal Wedding (the Charles and Di one) and Gene Hunt doesn’t want any trouble to affect the event. First it’s a publican and his family protesting about his pub being redeveloped as part of the Docklands development. This doesn’t seem to amount to anything so I’m assuming it’s crucial to the plot.
But more serious is a dog which found some dynamite and got blown up.
Hunt brings in “the usual suspects” – anarchists and troublemakers. One of them thinks he shouldn’t be there. “I-I don’t think I’m supposed to be here. I’m part of the Anti-Nazi League.” Hunt’s interrogation technique is to hit their goolies with a snooker ball. I think it’s supposed to be a deterrent.
They get a warning note.
This leads them to Danny Moore, a property developer working on Docklands developments. Alex is quite taken with him. He’s played by Rupert Graves.
He declines Gene’s offer of personal protection, but then comes to the station later, and takes Alex driving in his DeLorean.
After their trip, Alex can hear a ticking, and then an alarm goes off. She panics because her last memory of her mother is seeing her in a car which explodes. Moore finds the device. “Alex, it’s all right! Look, there’s a note, it’s supposed to frighten me.” He decides to take up Gene’s offer of protection, and Alex is the obvious choice.
To take her mind off the shock in the car, he takes her to the Blitz club, the one that Steve Strange ran, especially since Alex says “Thanks George” to the man running the coat check, as that would have been Boy George. There’s also a band playing Visage’s Fade to Grey. In the club, Alex bumps into Chris Skelton and Shaz, all new-romanticked up.
Alex sees the Ashes to Ashes clown.
She also sees the man who shot her, and gets an idea about who might have sent the warning note – the ‘O’s in the note are familiar, from a poster she saw in the pub. They arrest the son of the publican.
Alex is thinking about her mother, a lawyer. She suggests her to act on behalf of the boy. We see a flashback of her as a child on the Royal Wedding day, telling young Alex “Everyone else has gone home to watch the royal wedding with their parents. You staying here on your own, Alex. Do you understand? Make sure she concentrates. She’s easily distracted.”
The son, George Bonds, doesn’t look like an anarchist.
Alex has to take part in an initiation tradition, getting her bum stamped with “Property of the Metropolitan Police” which takes place just as her mother arrives to talk to her client, George.
A search of the pub has turned up some good evidence.
After the interview, Mrs Price asks Alex if she’d like a drink, and tries to flatter her into helping her, by spying on her colleagues. When Alex declines, she leaves with the bombshell “Thank God the only thing my daughter shares with you is her name. I’d be ashamed if she grew up to be like you.”
Alex decides that because this is all in her imagination, she might as well sleep with Danny Moore, but when she arrives in the penthouse lift, he’s bonking someone else.
Alex talks to George, to try to get him to confess. “I’ve seen where this ends, George. Boys who haven’t even been born yet, so full of hate that they strap bombs to themselves to obliterate innocent people.” “Not even the IRA would do that.” “Do you remember when I said that it was futile to fight? Well…I was wrong and you were right. It’s never futile to fight, George.” “What are you talking about?” “I am fighting for my life. I am fighting to see my little girl again.” “You’re barking.” “Just don’t be driven by hate, George. Be driven by love.”
They’re interrupted by Gene arriving with George’s dad, intending to charge him with the bombing. But then George says it was him. “I did it. I’m the bomber. It’s me. I was trying to scare Moore away. I wanted you to be proud of me, Dad.”
In the squad room, they’ve got a telly and are watching the wedding. Ray says “Nobody does this better than us. Nobody.” “Are you crying, mate?”
Alex’s mum and Mrs Bonds arrive. Alex starts arguing with her mother. Gene gets out the Presto bag that the dynamite was found in. He throws it to Mrs Bonds. Mr Bonds yells “Get down!” and dives under a table, because he knew what was in it, although Gene had swapped the dynamite for some garibaldis. He shows the real dynamite. “You were expecting these, were you, Private Bonds? You’re nicked.” “I’m sorry, I don’t understand.” “He served in the Army in North Africa, blowing up sunburnt Germans, knows his way around a set of explosives. You’re the bomber, aren’t you? You bitter old bastard?”
Danny Moore invites them all to a street party, and makes a speech about how he wants to preserve the life of the East End. I don’t believe a word of it.
Mrs Bonds and George are there. “For what it’s worth, I think it took a lot of courage to come here this evening.” “I thought about what you said, and you were right. Everybody must fight.”
Alex has a hunch and tells Gene she thinks there’s a bomb at the party. They evacuate people down the street. Alex is looking for the bomb when she looks over at George, standing at the door of the pub. He looks at her and yells “We are all prostitutes” – a lyric from a song that’s played earlier. Then he walks into the pub and it explodes.
Later that night, Alex’s mum comes to see her. “How are you?” “I’m fine. Um… Well, no, I mean, I’m not fine. I mean, I’m a mess.” “I’m not surprised, that must have been a horrible experience. I just wanted you to know I had no idea he was capable of that.” “No. Well, passion and belief in a cause. He won’t be the last.”
And outside her window, the boys from the station finally enact the second half of the initiation ritual, as they all drop their trousers in solidarity. That’s what they call it, anyway.
Media Centre Description: Drama series following the exploits of Life on Mars’ DCI Gene Hunt. The royal wedding looms, and CID is under pressure to keep the streets quiet. Realising that she’s stuck in the 80s for the time being, a desperate Alex distracts herself by contacting her mother and going on a date with a handsome Thatcherite. As bombs threaten to ruin Charles and Diana’s big day, Gene demands that Alex acknowledge this world has the power to hurt.
Recorded from BBC ONE on Thursday 14th February 2008 21:05
BBC Genome: BBC ONE Thursday 14th February 2008 21:05
After this there’s a trail for The Last Enemy and for FA Cup Football. Then a trail for Question Time coming from somewhere local for me – Watford.
Then the recording stops with the start of the Ten O’Clock News with George Alagiah.
There’s a mention of somewhere even closer to me than Watford in the Local news. And by coincidence, I’m going to Bovingdon tomorrow as I write this.
The next recording starts with the end of London Tonight and a very odd story about Uma Thurman attending the London premiere of her new movie The Accidental Husband in a fire engine accompanied by a phalanx of hot firefighters.
Then, there’s a repeat of last week’s Moving Wallpaper.
Media Centre Description: It’s too hot in the office and sex is in the air. Jonathan catches Sam fondling with an Echo Beach actor on the set and does everything in his power to track down the culprit. The team realise that Sam’s got soap fever after hearing her suggestions for new storylines that threaten the integrity of Echo Beach.
Recorded from ITV1 on Thursday 14th February 2008 22:33
The last recording today starts with the end of Anaconda.
Then, it’s the season finale of 30 Rock – Hiatus.
Jack and Liz are both getting health checks, Another cameo from Rachel Dratch.
Jack meanwhile is getting sex advice from Dr Spaceman. “Have I given you my new book? It’s about having a satisfying love life. For life.” “Is that you in these pictures?” “My techniques guarantee male orgasm.”
Liz is talking with the cast and crew about what they do since Tracy has disappeared and nobody knows where he is. Or maybe someone does. Pete says “I hope he’s okay.” Liz says “I hope he’s taking his medication.” Kenneth says “And I hope he took a jacket, because it can get real chilly there.”
Tracy meets Jesse Parcell, Kenneth’s cousin, in their home town. Kenneth has asked him to keep Tracy safe while the Black Crusaders are looking for him.
Elaine Stritch turns up as Jack’s mother Colleen. She first thinks Liz is his fiancée and seems delighted. Less so when Emily Mortimer appears as Phoebe.
Liz gets invited to Jack’s dinner with her mother and Phoebe – by Colleen. Phoebe isn’t impressing Colleen. “I always thought it’d be lovely to get married in the spring, just as the petunias start to bloom.” “I’m sorry, Phoebe. What?” “I always wanted to marry in the spring, just as the petunias bloom.” “Just when they’re what?” “Oh dear, is she hard of hearing?” “No, no, no, no. I can hear you. I just wanted to make sure you could hear you.”
Tracy has had enough of being anonymous in Jesse’s town. He calls Kenneth to come and get him. But Jesse catches him, and doesn’t want to let him go.
Jack has a heart attack in bed.
Liz is skyping with Floyd, but the connection isn’t good. The picture starts breaking up. Floyd says “Yeah, Liz… …not working… …Breaking up.” “Did you say we were breaking up?”
At the hospital, they’re not letting Phoebe in because she’s not family. “Now, his mother can go in if she wants to.” “Oh, no, I’m not going in there. I go in there, I get bird flu, I don’t come out.” Liz arrives. “Hi, I’m Liz Lemon. Somebody called me.” “Oh, yes, Mr. Donaghy designated you as his emergency contact.”
Dr Spaceman comes out of a room, everyone’s taken aback. “What? This? No, no. I was at a costume party earlier this evening. And the hostess’s dog attacked me, so I had to stab it. Jack’s going to be fine, but he has had a pretty serious cardiac episode. Also, I suspect he may have scurvy because he keeps asking for a lemon.” “Oh, no, that’s me.”
Jack is contemplating mortality. “I saw it, Lemon. My whole life passing right before my eyes. Neil Patterson pitching me the rotating microwave tray. Me personally coining the phrase, what’s the upside? Participating in Hands Across America. And all the time I’ve been on this earth, I have only one regret. I should have worked more.”
Kenneth turns up at Jesse’s house looking for Tracy. Jesse tells them that Tracy already left, but Kenneth notices Jesse’s wearing Tracy’s watch, and we see Tracy tied up behind the door.
Kenneth rescues Tracy, but not without getting shot at as they’re driving away.
While Phoebe is filling in the paperwork to make her his emergency contact, Colleen notices that the heart monitor is acting as a lie detector, so she takes the opportunity to ask some questions. “Jack, do you dye your hair?” “No, Mother. Why would I do that?” (Lie) “Okay, what’s your middle name?” “What?” “Just your middle name.” “Francis.” (True) “Did you take $20 out of my pocketbook in the summer of 1970?” “No, I did not.” (Lie) “Do you love me?” “Of course I do.” (True) “I knew it.” Phoebe asks “Do you love me?” and the machine starts beeping as a lie before he even answers. “I see.”
Tracy and Kenneth are stuck in traffic trying to get to the show. They see an ambulance and ask him to drive them with sirens. When he refuses, Kenneth makes a big sacrifice for Tracy.
Tracy makes it back to the show just in time.
As the show is ending, Liz returns to the hospital. “So I’m your emergency contact, huh?” “You’re the only person I know who wouldn’t hesitate to pull the plug. So when are you going to Cleveland?” “I’m not going. Are you getting married in two days?” “No, Phoebe is a lovely girl. But, no. I’m not getting married.” “So what do you think of the show?” “Honestly, I no longer think you’re doing a terrible job, and I’m very proud of you.” “Thanks, Jack. I’m going to pull the plug now.”
Media Centre Description: Sitcom set behind the scenes of a late-night sketch show. Tracy goes into hiding with Kenneth’s cousin, Jesse. Jack’s mother shows up ahead of his wedding to Phoebe; and Liz struggles to sustain a long-distance relationship with Floyd.
Recorded from Five on Thursday 14th February 2008 23:43
Here’s the ad breaks from The Simpsons.
Here’s the ad breaks from Moving Wallpaper.
Here’s the ad breaks from 30 Rock.
Adverts:
- trail: Skins
- Vauxhall Corsa
- Tefal
- Guinness World Records Gamer’s Edition
- Carcraft
- L’Oreal Lash Architect
- Be Kind Rewind in cinemas
- Vaseline
- Halifax
- Vauxhall Corsa
- trail: Rude Tube
- trail: The Big Bang Theory
- Army
- trail: Kingdom of Heaven
- trail: Cutting Edge: Baby Bible Bashers
- trail: UEFA Champions League
- trail: Rock Rivals
- Homebase
- Actimel
- Optical Express
- trail: Dexter
- Mars Planets
- Orange
- trail: Five News
- MFI
- Apple MacBook Air
- Valentines TXT
- The Bank Job in cinemas
- Trident Soft
- Original Source
- Bold 2in1
- Always Envive
- Full Tilt Poker
- Southern Comfort
- trail: Ice Road Truckers
- MFI
- Wii Sports – Ian Wright
- redhotpie.co.uk
- Stella Artois
- Full Tilt Poker
- Weetabix
- Txt Girls
- Rambo in cinemas
- trail: Neighbours on Five
- trail: Ice Road Truckers
- Southern Comfort
- Text Pull
- The Brave One on DVD
- Trident Soft
- Full Tilt Poker
- Crunchie